Logophobia??? not really..

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

I Hate

- to wake up on a sunday afternoon and kill time alone in hostel while others are inching to peace in their post prandial slumber.
- to spend a weekend without my friends in town.
- when the soup is too hot to savour.
- when my mom affixes an adjective to everything she says.
- to endure a class in stupor.
- when i fancy a shirt and find my wallet empty.
- when i am obliged to listen to people who talk unceasingly about things that don't interest me.
- when my dad buys me COLLARED, HORIZONTAL striped t shirts.
- the hangover.
- to wear a helmet.
- when people remind me about the pace at which i am losing my hair.
- to get wet in rain when i am dressed in formals for college.
- when i am asked to account for my expenses.
- when i don't get to know what's happening back at home.
- when people condemn my riding skills.
- when people don't answer my calls/reply back immediately.
- when i get cleaned out for a duck in a cricket match.
- when someone calls me manjuNATH.
- when my name is spelt as manjuNATH on my certificates.
- when people don't value LIBERO.
- to wait for food when my taste buds are rearing to go.
- Sunny/Bobby Deol's movies.
- when my brother farts at me.
- when i don't get to swear at my brothers.
- when people overestimate my preparation for an examination.
- discussing the answers outside the exam hall.
- the way they celebrate birthdays in Pizza Hut (pure embarrassment).
- fake accents.
- to use a zebra crossing.
- delicate darlings.
- to end this list :)

Friday, August 03, 2007

Wenlockphobia

I would prefer touching a slimy lizard over being left deserted in some gloomy, creepy corner of the government wenlock hospital. Even after being posted several times for two consecutive years wenlock hospital is no lesser a maze to me than how it was when i first stepped into it fresh from anatomy and physiology. A senior surgery professor thought we deserved to be kicked on our butts for not having taken a case. he didn't mind at all to articulate his thoughts. What a great start! i had thought.
It usually takes me 5 to 6 days of attending clinics in each posting to be able to direct someone to the location of my unit's wards, with the help of landmarks like "the kitchen under the stairs" and "the stinking loo next to the bridge" that is. No wonder i am the butt of all jokes in the unit when it comes to geography of wenlock. It was just the second day of a posting and i had almost lost my way when i saw the familiar plump head nurse lugging a patient with his gauze handcuffs back to the ward. So relieved i was. I later learnt that the patient was brought the previous night to the hospital by the police.
Few times i even ventured into the student forsaken part of the hospital through a different entrance which i earlier thought was the portal to a sophisticated government office. Instinctively i would try not to appear jumpy and gamble my way through the corridors till i got to a familiar "landmark". Many a times i would have walked double the distance owing to my poor orientation of the place.
B comes after A, C comes after B, D comes after C. That is how it is everywhere right. But people here in wenlock seem to despise the rule. Why not rename the scattered units and wards in order, i always wonder. It won't take long before i incorporate the map of this huge, intimidating maze into a couple of cells of my cortex. After all nobody is a born genius. Everybody would have learnt their way through. May be i am a li'l slow when it comes to geography :)